Year of the Gentleman...

Ok, I have to admit it. I am officially OBSESSED with Ne-yo! For the past couple of weeks I have been listening to his new album "year of the gentleman" and it's amazing. "Part of the List" is by far my favorite song on the album, then it's "Mad". Today I had to add this post because on my way to work I was listening to big boys neighborhood on power 106 and he was singing live - his voice is amazing even in the morning. I can honestly say his voice gives me shivers...Just thought I'd share with you guys...

P.S. When you get a chance definitely check it out!

I refuse to be a bag lady...

I'm sure you have all heard the song "Bag Lady" by Erykah Baduh...yes? no? maybe? Well if you have, you will know what I'm talking about, if not, you MUST listen to it. It's not a new song, but if you listen to it the message is amazing and empowering to women.

Bag lady you gone hurt your back

Dragging all them bags like that

I guess nobody ever told you

All you must hold on to

Is you, is you, is you

One day all them bags gone get in your way

One day all them bags gone get in your way

I said one day all them bags gone get in your way

One Day all them bags gone get in your way

So pack light

Pack light

Pack light

Ooh ooh

Bag lady you gone miss your bus

You can't hurry up

Cause you got too much stuff

When they see you comin

Niggas take off runnin

From you it's true oh yes they do

One day he gone say you crowdin my space

One day he gone say you crowdin my space

I said one day he gone say you crowdin my space

One day he gone say you crowdin my space

So pack light

Pack light

Pack light

Ooh ooh

Girl I know sometimes it's hard

And we can't let go

Oh when someone hurts you oh so bad inside

You can't deny it you can't stop crying

So oh, oh, oh

If you start breathin

Then you won't believe it

You'll feel so much better

(So much better baby)

Bag lady

Let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go

Ooh, ooh

Girl you don't need it

I betcha love can make it better

Betcha love can make it better

Betcha love can make it better

(Need someone to love you right)

Betcha love can make it better

(I betcha love, betcha love)

Betcha love can make it better

Betcha love can make it better

Betcha love can make it better

Betcha love can make it better

(I betcha love, betcha love)

Betcha love can make it better

(I betcha love, I betcha love, oh)

Betcha love can make it better

Betcha love can make it better

(Oh...)

Betcha love can make it better...

Bag lady, hmmLet it go, let it go, let it go, let it go

Girl you don't need that, hmm

What is she trying to say? I asked some guy friends and they laughed saying that she is just admitting that we girls are obsessed with bags and throw nothing but junk in it. The message is deeper though. The bag Baduh refers to is more than just a material bag: it's the heart.

"Bag lady you gone hurt your back

Dragging all them bags like that"

She is saying that very often our bag is full of needless things that weigh us down and keep us from moving along in our lives. Holding on to pain, hurt, anger, and dissappointment manifests itself in our bodies. The end result is that we often find ourselves being sick whether physically or emotionally. Sooner or later, our "baggage" causes our bodies to give out.

"Bag lady you gone miss your bus

You can't hurry up

Cause you got too much stuff"

When we spend too much time focusing on negative people, negative experiences, and negative feelings, we end up missing opportunities and blocking our blessings. We can't see the future because we are too busy living in the past. Meanwhile, our perpetrators go on living their lives: oblivious to the hurt they have caused. We only have the power to control our reactions to the bad things in life and we must learn to leave the past as the past and focus on the present and the future.

"When they see you comin

Niggas take off runnin

From you it's true oh yes they do"

I guess the question here is: why do we hurt? What are the things that have us hurting? Think about the many relationships we women start on crutches. A lot of women have a fear of being alone or missing out on a good man. Many women cover their wounds from previous relationships and experiences with their tight hairdos, pretty make-up, beautiful clothes, and a fake smile in order to attract somebody to keep them in their comfort zone and away from their loneliness. These women know they have no business getting involved when there are unresolved issues within them, but they hide it because otherwise people will run from them and avoid them. The message is that we must learn to not dwell on the negative experiences and we must be strong independent women. When we keep things inside, as time passes, the wounds get harder and harder to hide. When they are finally exposed , the important person in our life is suddenly history. When our "baggage" is exposed, we begin to "crowd his space" and he vanishes from our life.

The message is clear: the only thing that can ever stop us is....US! Yes, we have no control over what others do or say to us, but we CAN control our reactions. I'm not saying the "baggage" we have is something to be ashamed of, of course not, it's part of being a human being. The shame is not in having the baggage, but rather in KEEPING the "baggage".

So to all mybag ladies, search yourself! Be honest with yourself and ask yourself what is in your bag. When you realize what you are keeping inside do what you have to do - pray, cry, scream, liberate yourself!!!

"Girl I know sometimes it's hard

And we can't let go

Oh when someone hurts you oh so bad inside

You can't deny it you can't stop crying

So oh, oh, oh

If you start breathin

Then you won't believe it

You'll feel so much better"

So while my guy friends were wrong in saying that she is talking about our handbag fetish, they were right in the message : we do in fact carry a lot of worthless crap in our hearts. Crap that can be left in the past. They were right in saying that we are obsessed with the things that destroy us - negativitiy and sadness. WE MUST LEARN TO BE STRONG WOMEN: VISIONARIES OF THE FUTURE...

Bag lady....It's time to let it go...

On our way up...

I'm sitting in my office thinking how much longer I will have be the center of the 4-wall box that I call my cubicle. Don't get me wrong, I like my job and I am thankful to even have a job considering the economic crisis we are undergoing right now. As I am sitting here, I feel my blackberry vibrate and I look. I have an email from Barack Obama (well from his staff I should say). I am very proud of what he is doing. In a short 2 weeks he has come a long way! Today's email is really a motivation to stick it out and believe that something good is coming our way. Enjoy!

Friend --The economic crisis is growing more serious every day, and the time for action has come.Last week, the House of Representatives passed the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act, which will jumpstart our economy and put more than 3 million people back to work.I hope to sign the recovery plan into law in the next few weeks. But I need your help to spread the word and build support.It's not enough for this bill to simply pass Congress. Americans need to know how it will affect their lives -- they need to know that help is on the way and that this administration is investing in economic growth and stability.Governor Tim Kaine has agreed to record a video outlining the recovery plan and answering questions about what it means for your community. You can submit your questions online and then invite your friends, family, and neighbors to watch the video with you at an Economic Recovery House Meeting.Join thousands of people across the country by hosting or attending an Economic Recovery House Meeting this weekend.The stakes are too high to allow partisan politics to get in the way.That's why I've consulted with Republicans as well as Democrats to put together a plan that will address the crisis we face.I've also taken steps to ensure an unprecedented level of transparency and accountability. Once it's passed, you will be able to see how every penny in this plan is being spent.You can help restore confidence in our economy by making sure your friends, family, and neighbors understand how the recovery plan will impact your community.Sign up to host or attend an Economic Recovery House Meeting and submit your question for the video now:http://my.barackobama.com/recoveryOur ability to come together as a nation in difficult times has never been more important.I know I can rely on your spirit and resolve as we lead our country to recovery.Thank you,President Barack ObamaP.S. -- If you can't host or attend an Economic Recovery House Meeting, you can still submit your questions for Governor Kaine and then share the video with your friends and family this weekend. Learn more here:http://my.barackobama.com/recovery

I must say, his accountability approach to everything is really something I look up to. It's time that we really do practice democracy and not just preach it!

Have a great day!